I had written something I thought was just beautiful, but it got lost somewhere between phone and blog cyberspace. So it just won't sound so elegant the second time coming out of my heart and mind again! How weird that even a post can get lost in transition. Or translation. Or whatever the case may be...
Basically, though, I was expounding on how the ocean/ beach makes me feel: better, and closer to God. The worries and troubles don't go away- but I just feel better.
Anyway- I'm praying for transitions... So many changes taking place around me. Friends, family, loved ones... All experiencing change.
I'm singing the Casting Crowns song, "Praise you in this storm" - to myself, obviously, I won't torture you with my tone deaf singing, unless you sit in front of me at church, of course, then I will torture you because I feel safe enough there to belt. It. Out. And saaaang! ...But anyway, It has such deep meaning and gives me great comfort. So, if you get a chance, pray, and google Casting Crowns, and try to listen to that song. It helps. For real:)
Saturday, August 13, 2011
purple, pink, and black
sparkle, glitter, spunk
funny, worried, loved
sweet, spunky, wild!
We had a Justin Bieber party, and she was crushed when she realized we couldn't actually invite him (I think he is in Japan, or China or some place like that, on tour).
She loved the attention and festivities.
And I love her!
It's not even back-to-school time yet, but already we are getting into "fall" mode. Dance started again this week for the girly-goos and me, so we are dancing Monday through Thursday. I'm actually very OK with this because everyone is getting tired of "having nothing to do" - which is a joke, because there is always something to do, and if you can't find it, I will- although, my threats don't always work, even when I follow through, which tells me learning has not occurred... which is a whole other story... anyway...
I've discovered something about myself: I have flight of ideas, especially in Michael's. Does this happen to anyone else? The store is having an amazing clearance right now, and I'm so tempted to buy stuff! I have four bins and three shelves FULL of craft stuff. I do NOT need to buy ANYthing. but.... all the stuff is so pretty, and fresh, and my creative juices (which become dormant the moment I walk through my front door) begin to flow... if only...
Tommy did a fencing (sword skills- not fence building) camp last week! I am so excited for him, because he was really excited about going and participating. This is huge because Tommy loves to talk about doing lots of things but is very apprehensive (read: NOT HAPPENING) about actually following through and executing his grand plans. He did it, though, and wants to continue to learn and do! So, fencing my be added to the repertoire of our activities... hoping the instructor begins classes closer to home (my home, that is)!
Mark is doing endurance events. I'm glad he has found something, too. While running through mud and under live electric wires is not my thing, I've got to say, it's pretty cool for him! There's this song by the Goo-Goo Dolls (sigh...Johnny) that has a line that goes, "you bleed just to know you're alive..." yup- that's Mark.
So, that is the update on all of us this week... At least, activity-wise. I'm really wanting to do that writing thing, so I'm trying to be good about posting. It's good work; good for me; good for my soul. That, and praying. A lot. Not just for me, but I have so many friends who are burdened... jobs, sickness, hearts, lost, broken. It's tough stuff. It's nice to know that I am not in control, here. I love control... a bit of a control freak, I am, but it's all an illusion, my friends.
Romans 8:28: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose...
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
I was asked about my short and long term goals yesterday in a phone interview.
It was a very in-depth interview, with very in-depth questions (apparently).
My Family... My Faith
This is what I answered. After a long (it probably wasn't so long) pause, the interviewer continued, "yes? anything else?" ummm.....
"Actually... for life, you mean? "
"yes..." I'm thinking that she was thinking, 'yes, Dear, for life ... and three for each, please: long term and short term' ... Thank you, Lord, that this was a kind, polite, and southern lady (yes, people from the south tend to have better manners and be more patient... the people from the mid-west are a close second... I know... I've been all over the United States... not judging, no harm intended...I'm just sayin')
"...um... OK... well, yes. I'd like to successfully launch my children, for them to be good and responsible... to be true to my faith... I like to write, I'd like to write more, maybe a book... I want to re-enter nursing... I'm just not sure how that looks... I'd like to get my masters degree."
"Your masters... in what field?"
"I'm not sure... nursing, education, counseling..."
Could I sound more flighty? (don't answer that...)
Tough stuff, to actually try to map out my goals (on the fly, no less). I'm kind of stuck in the present. It's almost embarrassing. I mean, Mark has asked me, too, and my response is always the same: to support the kids, to support you.
But, what do you want to do?
My answer is: what I am doing...
Is that bad?
The present is all about my family, my children, my faith. I'm trying to be present with them, trying to instill the important stuff, and struggling with wondering if I'm doing a good job, or not. I guess I want to get more involved in nursing again, to generate income, but, really, my focus is on the family. I don't mean to sound altruistic... but I have a job to do... I'm doing it...
This is an example of what I want: I want us to pray more together, every day. I want us to have daily devotions.
What actually happens is this: we clean up (I'm a tidy-up person... it's just how it is) and then we go... and we have a kind of running dialogue between us (us being me, Jesus, God, the Holy Spirit and my kids... and the Saints- I talk to them, too-) ... but it isn't devotional, and it isn't separate and it's hardly ever quiet like I know it should be (except at meals and bed times - sometimes- )... I guess it is every day, though...
So. I freaked out just a little bit about this yesterday and today, on a big mental level, anyway. I mean, who doesn't have well articulated goals? Who asks those kind of questions in interviews these days anymore? I just wasn't prepared.
Or was I?
Family and Faith. I'm sure I should have said Faith and Family.
But, I did get a second call...
2 Corinthians 9: So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it.