Pumpkins, Princess, Sugar-plum

We went to an amazing open house hosted by the Washington Ballet a few weekends ago. I was brave enough to drive to DC with my kids, by myself AND parallel park on Wisconsin Avenue (perfectly on the first try!). It was crazy, and fun, and inspiring. Ballet dancers can do amazing things with their bodies! So, we got a very cool picture with the Sugarplum Fairy. Have I mentioned that I love ballet?

Today was beautiful! We spent all day outside at the pumpkin patch. Belvedere Plantation isn't too far from the house, so we go every year. It was a good time. There are even real bathrooms this year (no more out-houses! Yea!). They have less animals ('T' was bummed), better push-peddle cars (a real race track), and more to play on (very dirty children). We got to hang out with our friends (and great neighbors), the husbands got to chat, and the kids ran around all morning. Plus, the pumpkins are awesome!

Last weekend the girls went to a princess - pirate breakfast at our church. They had a great time and got to have cup-cakes for breakfast. What fun! I love that this church offers these fantastic opportunities for children to play and learn about our Lord and Savior. The band on Sunday night is great, too. It may sound weird, but the band (at church) is great! I grew up in a more conservative (Lutheran) church, so it is a little new to me to let loose with contemporary music, but I like it!

visits!

The week has been good! My friend and her family were in town visiting from San Francisco this week. So, we had "life academics" (no school work) on Wednesday and met them at my husband's fire station for a tour. You know, the National monuments are here, but a fire station is way cool when you are 3-1/2 and 1 years old. My kids love to visit their dad at work, too! We got to see them Thursday, as well. I have known this girl (lady, woman) for close to thirty (!) years. We were in each other's weddings! Now we are experiencing motherhood, together. Even though a continent separates us, we manage to keep in touch, asking each other for advice, and checking in with one another. God is awesome to put these special people in my life! I thank Him for all of my best friends. I love that I am able to rely on these amazing ladies... especially for those earthly struggles that most of us face!

lessons

OK... so, I knew bringing 'K' home to school would be challenging. I knew it would be hard. I even knew, on some level, that I would get frustrated with her and home-schooling, all together.

I had no idea...

We have been at it (home-school) for a good, solid month. The only encouragement I've gotten lately probably occurred the other day, when, in the allergist's office we were watching "Are You as Smart as a Fifth -Grader?" My first- grader knew more of the answers than the 30-ish year old woman playing along on the TV show knew. I don't even know if this was encouraging, or just distressing, knowing that some people out there are just not knowledgeable. She was a college graduate! She thought the Appalachian Mountains were in South America!

This week, we have been studying creation. The Creation. Adam and Eve, and Cain and Abel. I asked 'K' to tell me about Adam and Eve.

"Well, Adam and Eve lived in the garden and got in a fight and one killed the other."

"I think you are confusing stories, Honey... Adam and Eve did live in the Garden of Eden. Cain killed Abel. What did God give Adam and Eve?"

"Naked," she replies. I smile at her. She smiles back. OK.

"Yes, but how come they knew they were naked?" I ask. I'm trying to prompt her along, now. Surely, she remembers this story. It isn't a new story; she has heard it before.

"Naked... they hid in the flowers... they ate the grapes."

Hmmm.... guess we will be reviewing that one again.

Today, she was writing letters in order on a worksheet. One of the exercises had "_z_". She answered "y-z-", but didn't put the "a" next. I asked her, "well, what would come after z?"

"Now," she said. "You know, now I know my a-b-c's ..."

I am laughing. It is Friday. It's time to regroup for next week!

listen

(just a random, peaceful picture of Bermuda... wish we were there)

It has been an interesting week. 'T' has started attending the middle school for speech, and math lessons. He receives speech therapy because he still needs some articulation work (can't produce the /th/ sound), and he gets attention in pragmatics, which refers to his use of language, and how he stays "on task" in a conversation. The math is because, after five years of me telling the special education officials that he doesn't get it, he can't memorize it, and he has a hard time writing it, he finally, actually, tested positive (or in the definitive) for a math-learning disability.

I've been worried about him going to school, because he has been so nervous about things lately, but, of course, he rose to the occasion, and did fine. He will have to go every other day, and one of those days he stays extra for speech. He really likes the speech therapist (so do I). He worked with her last year. She is a vegetarian, and has a farm, loves animals, and really likes folklore and mythology, so she fits well with him. Thank God (literally) there are people who have a great affinity toward kids with special needs. Every time I get down about how hard it is to raise my son, to teach him, to reach him, I need to be thankful that God gave (loaned) 'T' to me the way he is, and that HE has put very specific people in my path to help me. Praise God!

'K' has continued to be a very challenging student. I've figured out a way to help her with lessons: keep her moving, and keep the lessons short. I've tried to feed her coffee this week to see if the stimulation would calm her a little, but wouldn't you know? --She isn't interested in coffee this week. She usually chugs mine behind my back, so I've purposely been trying to make it obviously available to her, but she has discovered sweet tea. Sweet tea does not calm down anyone... so that hasn't been helpful. The bouncy ball has been slightly helpful... it at least gives her exercise and an energy outlet in between lessons. It is a good thing she is just so cute. I have to focus on being consistent with this one, especially. She notices every little opening to get away with something.

'D' has even been a little distracted this week. She is my hardest worker, and loves things like workbooks and writing. This week, though, she has been distracted. By what, I don't know. The weather is changing... the moon is phasing... dance started... maybe she is tired. She is reading, like, five different books, and writing two different projects: a play (she is trying to win a prize to New York City), and "the best pet in the world" contest (I don't know what she wins for this, maybe another pet. Hope not).



I know God gives them to us for just a little while, but it has been a long week. So, today, we went to the zoo. We are studying Creation, so I figured the zoo would be a great science lesson. We went with my friend, 'S' and her just-turned-three-year-old daughter, 'B'. Fun, fun, fun! Really, for real, it was fun. The National Zoo is awesome. We got to hear the lioness roar. We got to see the elephants feed. The pandas were sleeping (of course). The red pandas actually got close to the fence, so we got to see them up close. We saw cheetahs, too. The only negative thing about the zoo isthe poor spacing of restrooms, and an up-hill walk to get out of the zoo at the end of the day. All-in-all it was a good day!


The verse on my heart tonight is one from James. It is James 1:19 : "Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger."

I am guilty of not being quick to hear at times, and too quick to get angry. So, this verse has been read twice by me today, in two different instances, and two different places. Random? Probably not... I was meant to read it. Hearing not only the words of another person, but the emotion behind them, can only be accomplished if you are listening. Listening is hearing the whole message of what someone is saying. Sometimes, the words don't mean exactly what the message is. Being slow to speak, of course, makes you listen more. Being slow to anger... well... that helps keep everyone happy. I need to work on this. Deep breathing helps, for sure. Meditating on scripture, though, benefits everyone around you. I'm glad I was led to this verse today. I'm glad it is on my mind -- even now, as children are still awake (sigh) and needing me to tuck them in...

(peace plant image from plant-care web site)

So, good night to all. Peace be with you!

Monday Mania

Today started well. A bit early, but I'm trying to be better about getting up and dressed before the children. I began very peacefully, quietly. I made banana bread, mopped the kitchen floor and had make up on before 8 am. I. don't. like. morning. As you can see, this is a pretty astonishing feat to accomplish. I used to work 12 hour days (in the hospital, in the ICU), so I really do feel inadequate with my un-organization in the morning, at times! Nevertheless, I accomplished my goals. Then, the girls woke up at roughly the same time, around 8am. The eight year old doesn't know how to be un-happy in the morning, even on only 7 hours of sleep (I'll get to that in a second), but the six year old starts and ends crabby. No problem, moving right along... breakfast, here is your work for the morning, Moms In Touch 9my praying moms group) is this morning (at 9:00), so do your work and stay quiet. They know how to do this... It's 8:40. Where is 'T'? Didn't I get him up, like, 30 minutes ago? -- He is asleep, like, coma, asleep. He doesn't want to get up. That was probably a clue I should have heeded, but we are both head-strong these days, so after poking and prodding, and finally cold water on the backside (it doesn't hurt him, and it is an effective way of rousing your child when you are thinking of less humane methods), he got up, got dressed, and got downstairs prior to my peaceful prayer group arriving. I love praying with these women. I love the peace it brings.

The first meltdown occurred at 9:15. It isn't too unusual that there is conflict first thing in the morning with 'T': he takes a while to get going, his structure was changed this morning. So, he calmed down rather quickly, but the next one (meltdown) at 11:00 went on for about 40 minutes. Most of it consisted of him yelling and screaming from his bed room, I'm sure for my benefit... but if any neighbors happened to be home, they got an earful... actually, just a rendition of "GIVE ME ONE MORE CHANCE!!!" I'm glad my prayerful friends weren't around to witness this, but one of them (at least) might read this and pray for me the rest of the week (hint, hint).

So, I think this may have started last night, actually, when I caught the girls having an impromptu wrestling match (!) at 10:30 at night. I really thought they were asleep. Not only were the girls awake, but so was the boy! It explains why he didn't want to get up this morning, and why we will be observing a 7:00 bedtime tonight!

On top of all this, my yoga today was lacking energy because of a sore back, I haven't been the same since our road trip to and from Florida. I had a new student, today, though, and I really want to make good impressions!

I'm praying for more flexibility (not just in my back). Today, if I were more flexible, perhaps the major meltdown could have been avoided. I HATE it when my twelve year old acts (literally) like a 3 year old. I hate it that I get so frustrated by it, and that by the time it is over I feel like I've lost my temper as well. I don't flail about and shout (maybe that would actually stun him into silence), but I get angry and upset. And, the girls, of course, witness everything. I know family situations teach a lot of great lessons, but when situations get so frustrating, it is hard to keep learning the lessons.

It is so very hard, at this point, to discern what is adolescence rearing it's (annoying) head, or if these behaviors are symptoms of food allergies, or if these are all autism spectrum issues...or a combination of it all (probably, a combination). So, I pray for discernment and wisdom as I continue to set limits, and teach appropriate responses to situations. I also pray for more patience. Lately, mine seems to be lacking! I don't want to be so manic-feeling all the time!

Patience, wisdom, and discernment. And tomorrow will be a better day!

Friday

Yea! It is Friday! Or... Ugh! It is Friday...

Fridays are great! It is the end of the "work"week. We can sleep in the next day, stay up late tonight, watch movies. No schooling over the weekend (formal school, anyway. We're always learning, right?). Friday is the day of the week we look forward to. I like Fridays!

Friday, also, tends to be the hardest day! The desire to slack off from work is great. Why shouldn't we relax, take it easy, and skip math? The guinea pig will live one more day without clean litter. The turtles don't really need a filter change; and who cares if we finish the science lesson, or not? (I do care, by the way, but Friday is Friday)

Something else about Friday: The behavior is always worse this day, more than any other day of the week. I think it has to do with fatigue. I think it has to do with anticipation of the day off. I think, also, it is the end of the week, and sometimes we are just done by Friday. Morning. Finished, time to go back to bed!

Today went well, but not as planned. The husband left notes needed for a quiz on the computer at home, and he was at work, and the quiz was open, could I please deliver them, now, in the next hour or so, as the quiz couldn't be closed once opened, and the notes were needed. No problem, and it worked out great, because I needed to be somewhere close to where he was working and the kids could hang out with him. Today was a good lesson in being flexible (flexibility in mind and in action). The kids got to see a Blackhawk helicopter (the coolest, besides a Bell 412, by the way), and a military-type leer jet. Plus, visiting with pilots and flight medics is always cool! I got to go to my appointment worry-free because the kids weren't waiting on me in the waiting room and I wasn't worried about what they were or were not doing in the waiting room. It is good to be flexible -- even on a Friday! We didn't get the science lesson done, but observing planes and helicopters can be science, right?




History was more important, today, anyway. Remember 9-11? We do, and did this morning. I think that, unfortunately, people may be beginning to forget. I didn't see a lot of patriotic colors on people. Nobody talked about the day, that I heard of. I don't even think there were any big memorial events close by where we live. I don't want to forget the importance of remembering such a day as this. My middle child was just a baby, and my oldest had just had his tonsils out, so we were home watching the events unfold. I will never forget the eerie silence that night. When planes are part of your background noise, and they all stop flying at once, it is amazing how quiet it is. I think the most important thing to remember about 9-11 is the patriotism and hope of a country momentarily stunned.

My son asked me this morning, "well, who won?"




"We did, of course, because we keep carrying on. We keep living, and we keep praying."

Remember Patriot Day. May God bless all the heroes of the day!

Labor day weekend is always such a fun weekend to travel to the condo! We went to visit my parents and brother and nephew in Wintergreen at my parent's place in the mountains, named: "The Condo"!!!! (exclamation points added because the kids are usually screaming about going). The mountains are always relaxing no matter when we visit. It is fun to see the wildflowers in spring and summer, the leaves changing colors in the fall, and the beautiful snow in the winter (although the winter visit is usually really, really, very cold!). We enjoy hiking (and it's free!), and the pool is usually fun, plus there are several hot tubs to relax and warm up in, and our favorite restaurant is fairly tolerable (the menu choices are shrinking, while the prices are increasing). This weekend we did all of that: we hiked, we swam and we ate. We also got to ride the chair-lifts (way fun), and go to a (small) craft fair (Kettle-corn, YUM!). While visiting with family can be stressful at times (think different parenting skills, and when to eat/where to eat issues), this weekend was pretty enjoyable.

I have been feeling worried about my feelings in regard to family members lately. I've been taking on a lot of guilt over choices I'm compelled to make that don't please everyone. In fact, that is the problem: I want everyone to be happy all the time. Alas, this is an impossible notion, and not even something most people would consider admirable. I know (mentally, anyway) that making choices for myself and my family in accordance with my spiritual beliefs is not going to always please everyone. I shouldn't feel guilty for making these choices. I know that the way I discipline my children is not always going to be in line with how someone else would discipline their own children (or grandchildren). I shouldn't feel guilty about that, either. Parenting is part of having children... it isn't always fun, and it is both my and my husband's responsibility to make disciples of our children. I know that choosing to say no to an activity, or cancelling a play date is going to hurt someones feelings, usually my children's feelings. Again, I know I'm in charge, and sometimes saying no and/or changing plans is a necessity. So why all the worries? I wonder why I feel sad or worried so much, lately. I have been having anxiety over disappointing everyone, to the point that I'm exhausted trying to please everyone. I think, too, that the more I want to live my life closer to home, closer to God, the more pressure I feel to not offend anyone. Weird, right? Well, this writing is helping me to sort some feelings out... yet, the pressure to feel happy about everything is overwhelming the actual feeling of being happy, leaving me feel, well, un-happy.

But, I'm trying.

And, it is getting better. Really. Writing is a wonderful tool. Therapy is a wonderful tool!

That being said... Praying is a wonderful gift! Pray, pray, pray. Prayer really helps me feel more centered. It gives me a chance to praise our Father. It gives me a chance to thank Christ for His life. It helps me realize all I have to be thankful for. It helps me feel safe and loved. It can help you, too!

So many wonderful things have happened lately! There are new babies in the family, friends have figured out texting on their cell phones, other friends are visiting from California soon, school has started, dance is starting back up (tomorrow! Yikes, where did the time go?).... the list goes on. I really do have a lot to be thankful for!

Home school this week is still pretty full of review which is nice, because we aren't feeling any kind of hectic-ness or overwhelming negativity about anything. That, actually, is a great highlight of doing school at home: no worries about being in a hurry! I am still trying to figure out if I need to add an actual curriculum overview type of plan to my (lack of a) plan. I mean, we're doing the important stuff (language arts, grammar, reading, history, science, math), but I don't have something that ties it all together. I think I need that something. I'm still a relatively new home-schooler. I feel the need for structure, still... at least a little bit more structure!