Labor day weekend is always such a fun weekend to travel to the condo! We went to visit my parents and brother and nephew in Wintergreen at my parent's place in the mountains, named: "The Condo"!!!! (exclamation points added because the kids are usually screaming about going). The mountains are always relaxing no matter when we visit. It is fun to see the wildflowers in spring and summer, the leaves changing colors in the fall, and the beautiful snow in the winter (although the winter visit is usually really, really, very cold!). We enjoy hiking (and it's free!), and the pool is usually fun, plus there are several hot tubs to relax and warm up in, and our favorite restaurant is fairly tolerable (the menu choices are shrinking, while the prices are increasing). This weekend we did all of that: we hiked, we swam and we ate. We also got to ride the chair-lifts (way fun), and go to a (small) craft fair (Kettle-corn, YUM!). While visiting with family can be stressful at times (think different parenting skills, and when to eat/where to eat issues), this weekend was pretty enjoyable.

I have been feeling worried about my feelings in regard to family members lately. I've been taking on a lot of guilt over choices I'm compelled to make that don't please everyone. In fact, that is the problem: I want everyone to be happy all the time. Alas, this is an impossible notion, and not even something most people would consider admirable. I know (mentally, anyway) that making choices for myself and my family in accordance with my spiritual beliefs is not going to always please everyone. I shouldn't feel guilty for making these choices. I know that the way I discipline my children is not always going to be in line with how someone else would discipline their own children (or grandchildren). I shouldn't feel guilty about that, either. Parenting is part of having children... it isn't always fun, and it is both my and my husband's responsibility to make disciples of our children. I know that choosing to say no to an activity, or cancelling a play date is going to hurt someones feelings, usually my children's feelings. Again, I know I'm in charge, and sometimes saying no and/or changing plans is a necessity. So why all the worries? I wonder why I feel sad or worried so much, lately. I have been having anxiety over disappointing everyone, to the point that I'm exhausted trying to please everyone. I think, too, that the more I want to live my life closer to home, closer to God, the more pressure I feel to not offend anyone. Weird, right? Well, this writing is helping me to sort some feelings out... yet, the pressure to feel happy about everything is overwhelming the actual feeling of being happy, leaving me feel, well, un-happy.

But, I'm trying.

And, it is getting better. Really. Writing is a wonderful tool. Therapy is a wonderful tool!

That being said... Praying is a wonderful gift! Pray, pray, pray. Prayer really helps me feel more centered. It gives me a chance to praise our Father. It gives me a chance to thank Christ for His life. It helps me realize all I have to be thankful for. It helps me feel safe and loved. It can help you, too!

So many wonderful things have happened lately! There are new babies in the family, friends have figured out texting on their cell phones, other friends are visiting from California soon, school has started, dance is starting back up (tomorrow! Yikes, where did the time go?).... the list goes on. I really do have a lot to be thankful for!

Home school this week is still pretty full of review which is nice, because we aren't feeling any kind of hectic-ness or overwhelming negativity about anything. That, actually, is a great highlight of doing school at home: no worries about being in a hurry! I am still trying to figure out if I need to add an actual curriculum overview type of plan to my (lack of a) plan. I mean, we're doing the important stuff (language arts, grammar, reading, history, science, math), but I don't have something that ties it all together. I think I need that something. I'm still a relatively new home-schooler. I feel the need for structure, still... at least a little bit more structure!