Parents, You Are Seen…

 I see you…

You, parents, are on my heart and in my prayers.

While trying to avoid being overstimulated by social media, the news, the radio, all forms of communication, ETCETERA, and AD NASEUM, it is impossible to completely not be aware of the news, and the consequences of last week’s events. The blame game has commenced, the politicians who have been calling those of us on the right threats to democracy, fascists, nazis, bigots, racists, and evil doers are starting their gaslighting campaign, OR doubling down on their rhetoric and celebrating.

I am bereft. I am appalled. I am disgusted.

I am also a Christian, and loving. I also seek common ground. 

I have been caring for my elderly father this past week, away from my husband, away from my support system of friends. I am absolutely, one hundred percent ALL IN with helping to take care of my dad. I wouldn’t have it any other way. He, too, has been very teary and angry about the assassination of Charlie, and the fall out that has followed. We’ve cried together, raged together, and reminisced. A lot. It is especially meaningful that as I draw closer to my dad and visit more often that we are able to have really deep conversations, share memories, and, for me, soak up every bit of wisdom that I can.

I’ve said before that no childhood is perfect. My brother and I moved every three years, my dad was often deployed for months at a time when we were young, and very married to his job as we got older. Mom was nurse, on shift work, or commuting to and from DC while we were in high school. Kyle and I are Generation X- and all that entails certainly describes us. I raised my brother for a time, and he certainly played the part of big brother/ protector when situations called for them. I never doubted my parents love. They did a great job. They supported us unconditionally. My brother and I were little grown-ups before we needed to be, but we’re better for it.

So, I heard on the news today a commentator lamenting about “where are these kids’ parents?”  Of course referring to the kids  (and adults) who are celebrating the demise of Charlie Kirk, the death of a United Health Care CEO,  and the violence culture that is becoming a new and sad reality in this country.

Let me say this about that…

We are dealing with our own daughter who is among the leftist culture. I would like to believe she is not celebrating anyone’s death, however, I don’t know. I know she hates the right. She hates Trump. She has chosen to have “no contact” with us, for why?  We don’t even know why. All of this came out of the blue.

My point is this: She was raised in a good home, she was homescchooled, she was brought up in church with a strong Christian moral compass. She wanted to be a missionary. She went to a conservative Christian college. We gave her music lessons from the time she was eight until she went to colllege. She played some sports. We took her to workshops and practices. She danced. We constantly told her how talented she was, how beautiful she was, how much we loved her, valued her. 

SHE made the choice to draw away, and come up with this narrative that we were awful. She decided to walk away from her faith. She decided to walk away from her family. 

And I’m heartbroken. I cry every day. This week while commentators and the Governor from Utah were imploring people to hug their families, and talk with people they disagree with, I thought, “Well, I’d love to.”

But I can’t. And it hurts more than anyone could imagine. 

I do blame social media, and I blame the algorithms that lead children down these dark, dangerous holes of “self expression” and the encouragement of hatred of self and families, and violence. In some cases, I’m sure, parenting may be to blame somewhat- but in the case of the assassin? Everything I’ve seen so far looks like he grew up in a regular family, and changed when he left home. I may be wrong- I’m obviously not on the case, or an investigator, or even watching the news 24/7. 

It’s not always the parenting. We (my husband and I) were far from perfect. We fought, and went through some very challenging times, including a short separation. But our kids had a front row seat to witness communication, love, conflict resolution, and forgiveness. No one is perfect except for the Guy who walked on water. We parents… we are hurting.

I want to echo the sentiments of the Governor from Utah: Seek non-violence. Seek discussion. 

Be like Charlie. Speak truth in kindness, but boldly. Go to church. Seek to learn something. Do not be silenced. Be kind. Love your family.

#iamcharliekirk #parentingadultchildren #whenithurts

Enough

Yesterday was a hard day.

It’s been a hard week, really. The revelation that a young, beautiful refugee from Ukraine was stabbed in the neck by someone who had MULTIPLE prior arrests was bad enough. This kind of FAILURE of the justice system is unconscionable. 

The assassination of Charlie Kirk is devastating, heartbreaking, and horrific. 

This man used his words to galvanize young people toward Christ, toward values, toward becoming  people that stand up for the right. He didn’t put people down, He spoke truth. He spoke common sense. He spoke openly, and yes, critically, of the dangers of pushing harmful hormonal treatments and performing radical surgeries on young people- people too young to make major life decisions, too young to vote, and often too young to even drive. He spoke Biblical truth about marriage, family and Godly living. He spoke truth about the dangers of not having a moral compass to guide decision making on a personal level, and then broadened that idea to leaders and government officials. Shouldn’t people representing the people in our government also be guided by Godly príncipes?

He was effective at reaching people across all generations, but he especially had a heart for our youth.

And someone killed him for it.  A faceless coward took the life of a young man and orphaned a young family. 

And ignited the righteous anger of A LOT of people in this nation, in this world. 

ENOUGH

It is so interesting to me that the party of:

coexist

unity

get along

tolerance

everyone belongs

no guns

no violence

is the party that is killing and attempting to kill people that dare to speak common sense, and bring common sense back to this nation.

This is a country. We have borders. It is not inhumane to enforce our borders and our laws. Every other country in the world does the same.

This is not a socialist country.. or a fascist, or a nazi one. Nor is our President. Read your history books, and dictionaries.

I don’t recall the “right” calling for the assassination of any of the left leaders during any of the last administrations that were Democrat lead. I’m appalled at the merchandise for sale that call for the extermination of our president.

I’m horrified that people are celebrating the killing of not just Charlie, but of the encouraged inciting of violence toward conservative republicans, and the celebration of the assassination attempts, the killing of the United Healthcare CEO, and the suppression of news stories that don’t fit the mainstream media’s narratives.

We are not a threat to democracy- politicians on the left need to stop touting that. Democracy is not one sided. It is debate, discourse, voting, free speech, and freedom from oppression. 

KILLING YOUR POLITICAL OPPONENTS OR PEOPLE YOU DON’T AGREE WITH IS WHAT THE FASCIST/NAZI/CORRUPT GOVERNMENTS DO.

Again- you don’t see the conservatives killing or silencing people or calling for it.

Or looting or burning cars or cities, for that matter.

ENOUGH.

May God comfort Charlie’s family and friends, and all of us who mourn his loss. May God heal this country and the people that seek to destroy it. May Jesus be with all of us, surround us, comfort us. May the Holy Spirit Guide us and fill us.